Legendary basketball player, perhaps?
I'm not a big sports fan and most of the time I'm pretty clueless about who the star players are, but because of Jordan's success and popularity amongst his fans, I know who he is, by name anyway.
Regardless of what you thought about a moment ago when I asked what comes to mind when you hear Michael Jordan's name, or whether you're a fan of his or not, my guess is that you didn't say anything along the lines of:
- "That's the guy who let his team down 26 times when it really mattered."
- "The guy who has failed over and over and over again."
- "Isn't that the guy who lost nearly 300 games?"
Surprised? Does this sound like the same Micheal Jordan you thought of?
Here's what Micheal Jordan has to say, "I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
However, when it comes to our own failures and not so shiny moments, given the amount of shame and guilt we pile on ourselves, you'd think they were on a neon sign on top of a mountain for all the world to see.
But what if Michael is right? What if it is our failures that allow us to succeed? What if the very thing you've been beating yourself up for (maybe for years) is the key to your success? What, do you suppose, would change in your life if you re-framed your so-called failures as golden opportunities to learn from and then let them propel you forward on your
A couple of years ago I was faced with one of these moments. During my coach training I was given the opportunity to work for the company where I was being trained. As part of the acceptance process, I was asked to coach the company CEO. To say I was nervous would be a HUGE understatement. The session started out okay and then got worse and worse as I got more and more nervous. We're not talking about a little stumble, we're talking a full out face plant on the cement kind of bad. I went home that night humiliated, embarrassed, and full of guilt and shame.
Part of me wanted to curl up in a little ball, lick my wounds and pretend it didn't happen. However, I knew I had two choices, I could either accept defeat and give up on my dream to be a coach, or I could separate my worth from my actions, learn from my mistakes and move forward. As you've probably guessed, I chose the latter. And no, it didn't mean suddenly everything got easy, but was it worth it? Yes! My "failure" moment came bearing gifts. It shined light on areas where I could change and limitations I could overcome.
I am just like you and there are other times in my life when I have held on to the feelings of shame and embarrassment for much longer than I needed to and, through the process, I measured my worth by what I did rather than who I am.
The good news though, is that we don't have to keep repeating the process. We can make another choice and choose to see our failures and our mistakes as our teachers and love them as such. We can choose to separate our actions from our worth as a divine soul. As simple as it sounds, it really is a choice.
If there is failure or mistake you are beating yourself up over, my invitation for you this month is to change the lens through which you are viewing the experience. Make amends where you need to, and then look for the gifts from the experience.
Remember, YOU are a success simply because you are (exist); anything you do (actions) on top of that is icing on
With love and gratitude for you!
Dream Body Coach Lorie
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